“Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks into mine”
True love, soul mates, destiny—it all sounds nice doesn’t it? Thinking out there in this grand world, there is one person—one individual who understands you so well, that when you meet that person you both ‘just know.’ Out of 6.8 billion people in the world, you are telling me there is only one person out there that will truly ever understand me—completely? As if my odds for finding happiness wasn’t already a long shot. I mean, I’m sorry—One? Out of how many people? But why, why is this even an idea floating out in society that there is only one person out there somewhere that will understand you better then you do yourself? Sure, the idea is romantic, but let’s be real, is it plausible? I mean, in my short 24 years of living, I can say I have been in love twice. I was happy, I saw futures with both of these women (no, not at the same time) and I could have definitely seen myself settling down with either one of them at some point in our lives. The idea of soul mates sounds nice, it really does, but I’m not sure if I can fully believe in something that.
This quote is from one of my all-time favorite movies. Casablanca is a classic, and if you have not seen it, you should go watch it, like right now. No, I’m serious, go watch it this instance, then come back and read the rest of my post. This movie, along with many other hollywood films have bolstered the stereotype given to this idea of ‘true love’. Films, literature, and the arts have all painted this non-realistic view of the concept of what a relationship should look like.
The title of this post is borrowed from Plato in his Symposium, who believed that during the time of the gods, humans were actually one being with two sets of legs and arms and two heads facing opposite directions. These creatures were very powerful, so powerful they frightened the gods who realized something had to be done. Therefore, Zeus decided to split them in two, and with Apollo aiding in the healing process and rearranging their genitals, man and woman were made as we are today. The creatures he split up were described as this:
“Now here is why there were three kinds, and why they were as I described them: the male kind was originally an offspring of the sun, the female of the earth, and the one that combined both genders was an offspring of the moon, because the moon shares in both. They were spherical, and so was their motion, because they were like their parents in the sky.”
When these beings were first split, they immediately longed for the person they were split from, their touch, their kiss; they wanted to make their body’s one again. Where did the idea of a soul mate come from? Looks like Plato may have had a small hand in that. Though, Hollywood and various authors have put the idea of ‘the one’ out there more than anyone. Not everyone has heard of Plato, but everyone has seen or heard about The Notebook. Don’t get me wrong, the idea of a soul mate and person is great. However, I don’t believe there is only one capable person out there.
Hopefully, since I’m only 24 and have only been in love twice, I haven’t used my chances up. I think I’ll still meet someone eventually and fall in love again, get married—the whole nine yards. Will I ever say that person is my soul mate though? I don’t think so. I don’t think I could believe that I was destined to meet this person and fall in love and live happily ever after (which should be another post, because we all know that shit rarely happens). When it happens, I’ll meet a girl that for some reason can put up with my quirks. She will understand, well maybe not understand but live with the fact I will probably throw a remote into a TV on more than one occasion while watching sports. I don’t want to go into the ideal woman for me, but I do believe she is out there and hopefully there is more than one chance to meet her. There has to be. The odds are not in my favor otherwise.